Often labelled as the “man of the family”, the problems which fathers face whilst upbringing another life is tough. Why does it have to be this tough? Because a ‘father’ is supposed to ‘provide’ for his family and addressing the internal issues seems to be a distant dream. Fathers forget about their personal aspirations and solely focus on providing abundance of happiness and adventures for their younger one. With not much encouragement and platforms which address the issues fathers face, We Positive Parenting would like to thank all the dads out there for the efforts put in to build the foundation of his family.
Fathers, who were men before, have been suppressed from revealing their emotional side and feelings from a very young age. Surrounded by comments like ‘mard nahi rote’, ‘grow a pair’ etc, men have always found it tough to have a firm grip over their holistic wellbeing. With societal pressures of getting married at an early age, earning a handsome salary from the onset, owning a house, buying a new car and taking care of the household expenses – men are burdened with all these thoughts while trying to figure their lives out.
They are supposed to keep it together and yet sometimes, are neglected in their emotional wellbeing and child’s upbringing
Let’s take this space to address the challenges dads face.
1. Lack of realistic expectations
Fathers tend to nurture their young ones through ways which were not provided by their fathers. The role of a ‘Father’ has evolved over the years and through the generational gap with their child, it gets tough to match their level of thinking and understanding. By being emotionally distant, stressed by work – dads find it tough on how to strike a balance in order to build a bond with their child
2. Lack of family time
Providing for the family, Securing the future of the family, Building a strong foundation for the family is where most of the ‘Dad-life’ goes away. The already existing societal pressure makes it all the more tough for fathers to spend quality time with his family.
3. Economical challenges
The world runs on money. Without it, living a particular type of life is just a dream. Money is the biggest factor which ties all the verticals of life together. Basic necessities like food, shelter, tuition and clothing are dependent on our economic status.
4. Lack of me-time
When was the last time dads did something for themselves? When was the last time they took a peaceful walk? When was the last time they sat down and watched a movie? When was the last time they sipped their evening chai without so many thoughts clashing within?. Me-time is often used to unwind and stray away from the pressures of life. The importance of having such moments is important because the mind and body needs to rest in order to function at its optimal the next day.
How to strike a balance between fatherhood and work-life?
1. Enjoy family meals
2. Plan an annual family vacation trip
3. Work from home
4. Exercise
1. Enjoy family meals
End your day by having your favourite meal with your loved ones. Talk about your day, ask people on the table about their day, share your troubles, lend an ear to the queries. Such moments in life are what soothes a father’s heart the most.
2. Plan an annual family vacation trip
Make this a ritual. A family vacation is essential to gain new experiences and develop a bond which results in trust and confinement. Coordinate with your spouse, take your kids and plan that trip for a week-10 days.
3. Work from home
We are living in a digital age. We don’t just have computers – we have tablets, laptops and cell phones which work as good (or even better) than computers. With education and infrastructure heavily relying on the digital space, the ‘office culture’ is slowly drifting to the online medium. Many companies are looking towards this system because it eliminates a lot of overhead costs. How does this help? This allows you to be at home, work and at the same time, spend some quality time with your kids.
4. Exercise
Get your body moving. Sitting in an enclosed space for many hours together hampers your overall well-being. A morning walk can do wonders for you! Exercising leads to excess energy levels and thus, allowing you to be more active with your family.
Importance of a father in a child’s upbringing
Fathering a child is easy but being a dad is a life-long task. This role is the foundation of a child’s personality and upbringing.
1. Emotional Development
Just like mothers, fathers play an important role in their child’s emotional development. Children look up to their dads for penning down rules for them. They also look at them to provide a sense of security, both physically and emotionally. Studies have concluded that emotionally appreciative and supportive dads result in their child to be more socially developed.
2. Setting the bar
A child looks up to his dad on how to treat others. They watch, learn and implement the same ways which were taught by his father. Friends, lovers, and spouses will all be chosen based on how the child perceived the meaning of the relationship with his or her father. How the father treats people – is the same way his/her child will dictate relationships once they grow up.
Whenever possible, go and tell your dad that you love him and thank you for being there.
